Empathy

Composed 6/7/16
Description: It’s a bitch.

Sometimes I pride on a heart made of ice
But there’s no such thing
Tragedy pierces and
Anger melts it
Sadness seizes and squeezes until tears leak
Out between clenched fingers
Happiness radiates and thaws
Hearts throb but it must freeze again
Because ice crystals keep the scoundrels at bay
But it inevitably melts away
And it always burns

Made of Ice

Composed 1/5/16
Description: An odd wish, I suppose.

I wish I was a girl of ice
So I could fearlessly
Walk out in the ruthless cold
And stroll among the flurries

I see my empty eyes
Reflective like the shallow lakes
As the wind grasps my dress and blows
A distant, lonely, lovely sound

As the world glitters and rests
I want to witness it
The beauty of a frozen night
Rawly, a girl made of ice

Unrelenting Presence

Composed 10/31/14
Description: Why is the weather always TERRIBLE on Halloween? As I fought my way through icy winds, sleet, and snow this evening I asked myself this question many times. Here is my best guess as to why this is likely the case.

The spirits of dead
And those who guard them in the ground
Arise from their lands and fly
Blocking out the sun
And all warmth from this world

So tangible are their haunted souls
The chill they bring fills the air
Manifesting in such icy winds
That sleet falls from the darkness high
And brings chill to body as well as mind

Mister Winter

Composed 2/17/14
Description: Well, it’s time to write about the now-cliche topic of the freakish winter we’ve been having. Yes, I live in one of those places that achieved a windchill of 40 below zero. Yes, I live in one of those places that has been colder than Antarctica (and sometimes Mars) on a semi frequent basis. Yes, I now no longer consider it “cold” outside unless my nose hairs freeze upon exiting a building. But, even now, as the extreme cold has (generally) subsided, winter is not done with me yet.

No, snow is a ceaseless reality around me. It snows and stays for days, and, once the sidewalks are clear, it snows again. I’ve forgotten what the ground looks like. Even when the snow is pushed away, thick sheets of ice conceal the earth. Looking at pictures from early in the school year, where everyone is wearing skirts and sweat-stains, is like looking at pictures of a different planet. Everyone here, including me, is thoroughly done with winter.

But it doesn’t ever stop. Take today, for instance. A relatively pleasant morning (and by pleasant I mean positive temperatures), followed by an afternoon of tiny ice pellets RAINING FROM THE SKY. And this was not even the occasional ice pellet. No, this was a thick spring shower… with ice.

At least that was unique. But no. By late afternoon, here we are again, with a heavy shower of thick white snow puffs falling from the hazy, snow-white sky. I walk inside the school cafeteria, flinging water on my friends. Soon after, it’s snowing so hard it’s impossible to see feet in front of you.

But despite all this, I must admit… Fresh snow is quite pretty all the same.

Oh, Mister Winter
You take my breath away
Your very skin is glitter
And it sparkles night and day
You press fresh kisses
On my cheeks, hair, eyelashes too
Whisper so I’ll reminisce
Bring energy of youth

You charm me with
The way you spread
Beauty where dark filth
Once bred
You grasp me tight
And don’t let go
Until I’m chilled
Down to the bone

You slow me down
And trip me up
Send me swerving down the lane
I’m out, I can’t
I’ve lost control
I won’t see another day

But when I’ve sprawled
Out in the cold
I look to the sky and see
The glossy shine of
Icy pines
And light snow-covered cities

Against my will then I smile
And there erase my pity
Oh, Mister Winter
You’re lucky you’re so pretty

Stubbornly Cold

Composed 1/3/14
Description: I think I’m going to try and write more poetry this year — and more poems about the daily events of my life. Stuff that I can look at ten years from now and go “ah, yes, I remember that person, that feeling, that day.” Everything from fun nights with friends to whatever I’m thinking that particular day. So I wrote something this evening, and I think it says a lot about me.

I sit on the floor
Stuffed in two blankets
And a hat
Because
I refuse to move
From my solitary haven
Even when its
Covered in ice

A Perfect Night

Composed: 7/14/13
Description: A dream from a few weeks ago.

Utter bliss hardly succeeds in describing the feeling.

I am running, bolting it — my arms straight out, ready for flight. I am screaming in pure ecstasy as I run, like I am on the world’s most gloriously terrifying rollercoaster.

I run through a snow covered forest in the morning light. The slender, icy branches and distant, snowy hills possess the kind of raw beauty reserved for fairytales and Planet Earth specials.

There is music playing – a song I’ve never heard. It probably does not exist. I’m not sure where it is coming from since it seems to fill the air in every direction.

I break from the trees into an endless, white clearing. Suddenly I remember that I am not alone. Another runs with me, several feet away; though, like me, he has been preoccupied with his own bliss and hasn’t recalled my presence until this moment. Not losing a stride, we glance at each other – both smiling, a certain gleam in our eyes. We know that, for both of us, this has been the best moment of our lives.

We join together, laughing, racing in the narrow hallway between an impossibly tall snow-covered wall and a line of snow piled atop large boulders. We laugh, our jaunt finally reaching an end as we jump into the somehow fluffy snow piles. We breathe heavily, but we are not tired.

The scene cuts, but I reemerge not but a few minutes later. There is another with us now – a face well-known. A man in the guise of a hunter of demons and other evil things. He stands a respectable distance away, as if not wanting to intrude.

My face and feelings are grim now. My friend wears an expression of utter severity as well. I point to the hunter as I address my friend.

“If there is evil after us I want him with me.”

My friend seems to soften into resignation as I wake.